57% of leaders doubt their conflict management skills.
According to Sept. 20, 2023 survey results from Robin Pou Inc., a leadership development firm, two of the top leadership skills that leaders doubt themselves on are managing conflict (57%) and establishing a thriving culture (54%).
It strikes me that these two areas are deeply intertwined. You can’t have a healthy company culture if you have leaders who don’t know how to manage conflict.
Unmanaged conflict erodes trust, communication, morale, commitment, motivation, and employee engagement. Ultimately, it impacts productivity. I believe that learning to manage conflict effectively may be the first step in creating a strong company culture.
In addition, feeling unable to manage conflict causes leader burnout, decreased productivity, and lower revenue.
Why Leaders Doubt Their Conflict Management Skills
Forces compounding the issue include:
1. Fear of looking weak to subordinates.
Many leaders avoid discussing their doubts about how they manage conflict due to their fear of looking weak, losing their credibility, or believing that they need to have all of the answers.
2. Leaders’ doubts about their conflict management skills often increases during periods of business uncertainty.
As organizations navigate unprecedented challenges, many leaders find themselves grappling with new and complex situations without the traditional support systems in place. This uncertainty has underscored the necessity for ongoing leadership development and training, particularly in conflict resolution and effective communication.
3. Managing conflict within and among remote employees and remote/hybrid teams requires new skills that few, if any, leaders have been trained in.
My LinkedIn connection, Kevin Turner, pointed out that… “establishing a thriving culture may be compounded by constant shifting between Remote/Onsite/Hybrid Work. A popular traditional Management style was management by walking around and those managers are having a hard time with trusting remote or hybrid employees are actually working all the hours they expect them too.”
4. In recent years, more and more businesses are taking sides on social issues that are outside of their core business. This has caused conflict between the company, employees, customers and government agencies.
People’s feelings about social issues are based on their values, and values-based conflicts are the most difficult to resolve. They don’t let go of their values, so compromise (with respect), or agreeing to disagree are the only ways to resolve them.
How to Increase Your Conflict Management Skills
Some solutions for increasing your conflict management skills include:
1. Normalizing the struggle.
Normalizing the struggle with conflict management is important so that leaders identify it and seek support. Acknowledging uncertainty can actually strengthen a leader’s credibility and foster a more open and trusting environment. By admitting that they don’t have all the answers, leaders invite collaboration and encourage their teams to contribute solutions. This approach not only empowers employees but also cultivates a culture of continuous learning and improvement.
Leaders can benefit from seeking feedback and actively listening to their team’s perspectives on conflict management. Engaging in open dialogues about challenges and potential solutions can help leaders refine their strategies and demonstrate a commitment to personal and organizational growth.
Moreover, vulnerability in leadership can humanize leaders, making them more relatable and approachable. Employees are more likely to feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and concerns when they see their leaders as authentic human beings who are willing to learn alongside them.
2. Sharing best practices.
Discussing best practices on how to manage conflict in the remote/hybrid workplace is crucial for several reasons.
First, it helps create a unified understanding across the organization of how conflicts should be addressed. This ensures consistency and fairness in handling disputes. It not only fosters a sense of security among employees but also enhances trust in leadership.
Second, sharing these practices encourages a culture of openness and continuous improvement. By discussing what works and what doesn’t, teams can learn from each other’s experiences. This leads to more effective conflict resolution strategies. The exchange of ideas can inspire innovative solutions that can be tailored to fit the unique dynamics of each team.
Moreover, with the lines between personal and professional life increasingly blurred in remote settings, it is vital to equip employees with the skills and tools needed to navigate conflicts that may arise from these overlaps. Best practices often include techniques for empathy, active listening, and effective communication. These are all essential for maintaining harmonious working relationships.
Additionally, sharing best practices helps prevent small issues from escalating into larger conflicts, thereby maintaining productivity and morale. When employees feel supported and understood, they are more likely to engage positively with their work and colleagues. This proactive approach not only reduces stress and potential burnout but also strengthens team cohesion and collaboration.
Ultimately, by integrating best practices into the fabric of the organization, leaders can cultivate a resilient and adaptable workforce capable of thriving in a remote/hybrid environment. This not only benefits individual employees but also contributes to the overall success and sustainability of the organization.
Advice from an Olympian
When I posted about this topic on LinkedIn, my connection Joe Jacobi shared wisdom from his time in the Olympics, “Don’t do this alone. More than 30 years later, I don’t think we could have fixed our conflict management challenges by ourselves. We had an amazing sports psychologist – head of sports psychology for the United States Olympic Committee – who guided and supported us… with ideas like the first one (Thank you, Shane Murphy :-) For the people trying to figure this out in real time and/or might be struggling with this, consider leaning into the second point sooner than later.”
3. Offering support.
To address gaps in conflict management skills, companies can invest in leadership coaching programs that focus on developing emotional intelligence, active listening, and mediation skills. By equipping leaders with the tools to handle conflicts constructively, organizations can foster a more harmonious and productive work environment.
Furthermore, peer mentoring and support networks can be invaluable. Encouraging leaders to connect and share experiences can provide them with diverse perspectives and innovative approaches to managing conflicts. This collaborative environment not only enhances leaders’ capabilities but also strengthens organizational resilience.
Ultimately, acknowledging and addressing these doubts can lead to more effective leadership. By embracing continuous learning and adaptation, leaders can better navigate the complexities of today’s business landscape, building trust and fostering a positive workplace culture that values open dialogue and mutual respect.
Read more about Conflict Management:
Donna Schilder